Breaking Age Barriers: My Journey in the World of Dating Apps

APP DATING …Everyone will agree that it is a minefield at the best of times, and I can confirm that it gets even more complicated with age for both men and women. I have spent my entire life-preserving and nurturing my body, so I'm in pretty good nick. Unfortunately, most people my age cannot say the same because they have invested in different aspects of their lives. The chances of men and women like me finding someone of a similar age, living with relevance and purpose, and having a youthful attitude and lifestyle are slim to nothing.

It leads to desperate measures on dating sites, where we downplay our age or even outright lie about it not to get filtered out of searches. When I talk to a potential match, I know from the first conversation if my date would be interested in dating an older man. If she is, then there will be a second conversation, and it is then that I reveal my actual age.

They will often ask, "Why did you lie about your age? That's terrible?" As if I don't know this, and say, "Have you ever thought about a relationship with an older man? What if you were unaware of my age? Is it not more important to do what feels right with a man who makes you feel special and accept whatever the future may bring?"

Regardless of sex, the partners' personalities, not their specific ages, ultimately make or break a partnership.

Perhaps naively, I have no problem with age-gap relationships because I am physically younger than my actual age and fitter than many men half my age. I have been single for so long that I don't give a damn what people think because it is tough to find someone in a shrinking candidate pool.

As an older man, I no longer fear commitment, which once terrified me. I have become patient and accepting that relationships can fail or succeed, regardless of age. There was a time that socially a significant age gap often raised eyebrows and social disapproval, but in these enlightened times, is age an accurate reflection of who we are?

Would it not be regrettable to reject someone you love because you fear what others may think? I know I'm not the only midlifer who is young at heart; by the same token, plenty of men and women are older than their years. Why don't we ignore the stereotypes, break the rules and shake things up?

Age is a number, not an assurance of health or how long you will live or that I will die sooner than you. My potential younger partners may meet someone in their age bracket, but that does not guarantee that one of them will not develop cancer or get run over by a car.

The probability of dying around the same time is more significant if you choose a partner of the same age. However, other additional factors can affect the durability of a relationship, such as the odds of both partners being faithful or the probability of remaining in love.

Would it not be better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all? Isn't having a life with someone you love now preferable to the risk of nothingness? Acceptance of who and what you are can give you the courage to live life in the here and now. Follow your heart and dismiss what others think. The mind is always trying to figure out what the heart already knows.

Finally, falling in love is a natural and enriching human experience that should be free from judgment and stigma. It is a personal choice that should be celebrated, not judged.

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